If you want to conquer fear, don't sit home and think about it. GO out and get busy. ~ Dale Carnegie
I am a master at sitting home and thinking, or to be more accurate, fretting, about something that scares me or bothers me for one reason or another. At the beginning of last year I spent most of my time fretting about the book events I had scheduled and the public speaking that came along with them. But a funny thing happened when I actually went out and did the events. After all the worrying, I had a great time at the events and I even enjoyed the public speaking. While I won't say I've totally conquered my fear of public speaking, I've come a long way and this year I am looking forward to the events instead of freaking out about them.
For me at least, Mr. Carnegie's advice was right on target. I doubt that sitting home and worrying has ever solved anything. GO out and do what scares you. You may be surprised at the results.
People are so afraid to do new things these days. I'm constantly telling my kids to go out do things that scare them or give them anxiety.
ReplyDeleteGreat post!
The only way we can conquer the fear is to do it.
ReplyDeleteIsn't it amazing how paralyzing fear can be? Even more so because we recognize it for its debilitating effects, yet we cave into it anyway???? It can be so hard at times to fight off. Taking a chance, a risk is the only way to move past those fears. So right....
ReplyDeleteAh, a much needed pep-talk/post this morning, Julie. Thank you! :)
ReplyDeleteIt's great advice! I'd be brilliant at public speaking if I could do it two people at a time :-)
ReplyDeleteAnnalisa, writing A-Z vignettes, at Wake Up, Eat, Write, Sleep
I hate public speaking, but the fact that you have done okay at it gives me hope that I could, too! Perhaps when I'm talking about something I love, and am passionate about, it'd be different than some of what I've had to present on at work. ;)
ReplyDeleteThat's great that you were able to work through your fear. The thought of public speaking still terrifies me.
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you faced those fears and got to reap the rewards. <<cliche overload, I know, but well-meant. :)
ReplyDeleteGreat advice! I sit at home and think a lot too, but when I get an opportunity, I face it the fear no matter how much it frightens me.
ReplyDeleteFacing our fear is the only way we will never be able to conquer it. :)
ReplyDeleteI have found exactly what you did, that I have always enjoyed the events and wondered why I got so worried before hand. I've settled down a bit now and don't even think about the speaking part before, only making sure I have everything I'm supposed to take with me! Concentrating on the physical necessities always helps with the jitters... Lisa, co-host AtoZ 2015, @ http://www.lisabuiecollard.com
ReplyDeleteAs social workers, I think we spend so much time trying to get people to slow down and think, it just becomes our nature. I have never been accused of being impulsive, but I am called brooding a lot!
ReplyDeleteGreat advice.
Julie, great advice. I hate to worry. The thing we're afraid of is not as bad as stewing in fear.
ReplyDeleteAnyone taking up the A-Z Challenge has had the 'Go' to post every day.
ReplyDeleteGO is a good mantra. Just when I'm sitting back too much, I do put myself out there. As writers we are introspective, but it's good to get out and have a dialogue with others.
ReplyDeleteHappy A to Z
That's great advice. I need to tell myself that about my next two projects, quit thinking, go.
ReplyDeleteI've come in late to find everyone on the A to Z thing how does it work? Sorry got to leave my link here as no option to do so in the identity section...
ReplyDeletehttp://www.familyaffairsandothermatters.com
Would love to know if I can join in half way through! Lx
Yes, go and do! Love this quote and your thoughts on this. I'm going to "go and do" something scary tomorrow -there's an open mic. author event in town . . . and I'm planning to go.
ReplyDeleteHi Julie - well done I know your well on your way to conquering your fear of public speaking .. and we do wait around too much for something to happen .. so get up and go ... cheers Hilary
ReplyDeleteMy I post deals with fear vs hope. Love this quote from The Shawshank Redemption, "Fear Can Hold You Prisoner. Hope Can Set You Free.
ReplyDeleteScribbles From Jenn - Visiting from the A to Z Challenge
I remember when you were scared about the public speaking and then it turned out so wonderful! You are so right-we have to just buckle up and go do it!
ReplyDeleteFear is everywhere.. It is a constant companion that will inhibit growing stronger if it is not conquered. I can look back at the things fear kept me from doing and wish I had more courage. But now I don't let fear stop me, it is an attitude of growth.
ReplyDeleteI try to not worry about things (main one being exams right now)because I never see a point. Worrying doesn't benefit me, it does the opposite and stresses me, so I tend to push things that stress and worry me down. By procrastinating. Often by reading. Going out and doing things would be much better XD
ReplyDeleteAnd then you went out and joined the A-Z Challenge and started kicking its butt, which is a big GO, too :)
ReplyDeleteWonderful Advice, Julie! I do the same thing--worry about book releases, Facebook parties--oh me oh my, what if no one shows up AND book signings. But when I push myself out of my comfort zone, I'm so happy I did and a little proud! Great to meet you and I'll be stopping by more often. Having a great time with the A to Z Challenge.
ReplyDeleteI can go out and do what scares me because I no longer give a $h!+ what people think of me when I fail.
ReplyDeleteSome times my biggest obstacle is getting out of my own way.
ReplyDeleteOkay, this is SO weird. Just seconds (literally) before I read this, I remembered I have an event coming up in early May and I started getting all nervous about it...even though it's a group event and I don't even have to speak at this one (that I know of!). I just get NERVOUS about the unknown. I don't know why. Any time I have to venture out of my comfort zone, it freaks me out. I've been that way all my life.
ReplyDeleteYes, all of this. ^_^ It's one of the simplest things and yet too often one of the hardest things - just go, just do whatever you're thinking about. I have a tendency to think way too much and over-analyze everything, so I often have to tell myself to just go do something. It works.
ReplyDeleteGreat advice although as a natural introvert I struggle with this too. Good to hear you ended up enjoying it. Sometimes we need to embrace the moment!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad your book events went well for you! I've done a lot of public speaking now, courtesy of a volunteer job and some workshops I did, and I can definitely say it's made me more comfortable with it all, but like you, I don't think I'll ever be fully comfortable with it. I definitely agree with doing what scares you.
ReplyDeleteI'm not afraid to sing in public, but I can't stand up and speak in public. I just freeze.
ReplyDeleteHow do you explain that?
Great advice, all around!
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